Tuesday, October 29, 2013

There's an Epidemic....and ADOPTION is the CURE!!


There’s an Epidemic…..and ADOPTION is the CURE!

I’m sure most of you have read or saw a new clip regarding the fifteen year old boy in Florida, Davion Only. With the help of his church family he sent out a plea to the public for a family.   The link below has Davion’s story, and his is just one of many stories that is near and dear to my heart.


It wasn’t until our own research into adoption, that we began to realize the epidemic that was plaguing our foster care systems.  Children, mostly five years and older, being left in the foster care system until they are eighteen years old. Some deemed behaviorally challenged, some medically and sadly some were deemed unadoptable based solely on their age.  It doesn’t mean they were less lovable, but they couldn’t provide a new parent with the adorable banter of a toddler or the innocence of an infant.  I’ve been a parent long enough to know…if you’re in it for the positive feedback from your children, then you’ll be waiting a long time.  It's a rewarding, but thankless job that will go unnoticed by your kids until they are in their thirties :)

When my husband and I married in May of 1999, we decided that we wanted a son. We also decided that we wanted an infant, but as I went through link after link on the internet I became horrified! Horrified by the fact that the foster care systems were overrun by older children that may never achieve the dream of having a lifetime of support from a forever family.  Statistically, it is African-American boys that sit at the top of this list. Once we became aware, it was a no brainer…white, back or purple…we wanted a son.

We adopted our oldest son, Michael from the State of New Jersey when he was five and half years old in May of 2002. Our second son, Isaiah followed in July 2004 at 4 days old from Illinois. The age gap was big between Michael and Isaiah, so we decided to adopt another boy in between the pair.  What we ended up with was a sibling group of three brothers, lovingly known as “The Three D’s”.  Dejon was nearly eight years old, Devan was six years old and DeAnthony had just turned five years old when they came to us from Missouri in June of 2006.  With five boys, we were very sure that our family was complete. My husband had his basketball team!!! However, things changed on March 29, 2007, only three months after finalizing our last adoption. We received a phone call that our son Isaiah’s, birthmother had just given birth to another boy and wanted to know if we wanted to adopt him. My suitcase was packed before I hung up!  We picked Julius up at 4 days old in Illinois on April 2, 2007.
Yes, six boys!!!  When you throw our daughters Jenna 27 and MyKayla 18 into the mix, you come up with 8ZENUFF a.k.a. The Clan!  It is also the title of our blog, homeschool and the vanity plate on the SUV.  You can check us out at:

My Final Thoughts:
Thousands of people have stepped forward in the last few weeks to adopt this amazing young man, but there are thousands of other boys...ALL in a similar situation. They to, want a forever family. Davion can only be matched with one family, but these other callers do not have to end their journey there. Call your own state’s foster care system and consider adopting an older child.  In most cases, they are deemed high needs based on their age alone, if that is the case, the state will pick up the cost of any adoption fees just to ensure these children’s dreams of a family come true!
 

 

6 comments:

  1. My husband and I talk about adoption a lot but I don't feel we have the resources. Isn't there a lot of screening and red tape to get through the approval process?

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  2. Every state is different Natalie, but yes....definitely can be a lot of hoop jumping. I think that is mostly so they match the right child, with the right family. As far as resources, if the kids are in the system the state will normally pick up the cost of court and attorney expenses. Also, any child who is older than 5 years old will normally be labeled "special needs", because of their age. That usually means they will receive a stipend and Medicaid until the age of 18 years old. Of course, kids are expensive....but the extra helped me to become a stay-at-home mom. Believe me, they love the fact that they can call home and say "I forgot my gym clothes, can you bring them to me?" ;) I've actually had one call me for take out. I drew the line on that one!!

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    1. I have been wanting to but worry about everything, from qualifying to being able to afford it, and finding a child that is a good fit. I think you are amazing. Your family is an inspiration.

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  3. That's wonderful Angela. I'm so glad you found all your boys! I know they couldn't have found a better mom.

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