Monday, August 11, 2014

Growing Too Quickly




 No! Make it stop! Where’s a shrinking machine? 

When did my babies become little pre-teens? School started back for my girls this week and I was doing fine up until the weekend before school started. Both of my girls are now in the sixth grade. They are both growing more and more independent which I should be happy about and I am, mostly.
They are outgrowing their clothes within a couple months now, they both have given up 99% of the cartoons they used to watch, they barely play with toys anymore, all they care about is their electronics, Minecraft was made by God apparently, I can’t keep food in my pantry, and they are both almost as tall as me! 

The weekend before school started my youngest (11 years old) comes inside and asks, “Can I go to ____’s house?” Her friend lives across the street. My first instinct was, “No.” My lovely husband kindly got on to me and said that I needed to start letting go. What mom wants to do that?! I always have a fear that she is going to not think and run out in the middle of the road with a car coming because she is ADHD but she and my husband assure me that she knows what to do. So I let go. Then, she comes inside and asks about going to her other friend’s house that is behind our house, behind a bunch of trees, and through a ditch. She either has to go through the ditch or around the neighborhood to get there so of course my first response was, “No.” Again I was made to see that it’s no big deal. She just walked around a group of trees and bypassed the ditch all together and I could still see her outside playing. Why oh why can’t she be like my other daughter. My 12 year old just wants to be in our backyard, no where else. She’s also autistic. I realize I can’t hold onto them forever but it just seems too dang soon to let them go do more things by themselves.

When school started Monday I did not, I repeat, DID NOT walk them to class. That was a big step for me. On the first day of school I always do that but it was requested by the girls that I don’t. I did get “I love you’s” as they got out of the car so I was happy. Abrial still has the same teacher and classroom but Maddy has to switch classes six times now. As soon as she brought home her schedule and I looked at it my eyes filled with tears and it really hit me, “Wow. Both of my girls are in sixth grade!” It won’t be long and they’ll be in middle school. I don’t know how much more I can take.
Thankfully, both girls have had a great first week of school. I haven’t heard one complaint and I’m proud that they are finding some independence. I just don’t have to like it. Lol. 

Thanks for reading!
~Jinni

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